Greek family

I married a Greek man whose family never accepted me. Being young and naive, I tried everything to fit in, converting from Catholicism to the Greek Orthodox faith, attending all family functions, including them in our lives. It was never enough.
My husband and I traveled to Crete with his family to visit his relatives there, and some extended family
members refused to share the dinner table with me because I was not Greek. One of those family members was a priest!
Our daughter, "Athena," was born four years later. What broke the camel's back for me was a Christmas dinner when she was 6. My father-in-law gave cards with $100 to all the grandchildren of Greek heritage. Athena received nothing and cried for hours wanting to know why her grandfather didn't love her. My husband just tried to stay neutral.
Abby, how far should someone have to go to fit in with their husband’s family?