Some great quotes

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour.
Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute.
THAT'S relativity.
-Albert Einstein

The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.
— Robert Frost

The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.

-Franklin P. Jones

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world everyday always just exactly fits the newspaper.

-Jerry Seinfeld

It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose.

-Darrin Weinberg

Life is pleasant.
Death is peaceful.
It's the transition that's troublesome.

Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.

Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers.

It is not exactly cheating, I prefer to consider it creative problem solving.

Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.

Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

Forgive your enemies but remember their names.

The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.

You learn in life when you lose.

Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them.
— Albert Einstein